How do I do it? Well over time I've come up with a few basic rules that seem to work for me. And so I wanted to share them with you, and see what you yourselves can come up with!
- Thou shall put real-life first. Always!
- Thy children shall always come before the pod
- Nighttime shall become my best friend
- Thou shall master the art of flying a ship while changing a diaper
- A game schedule thou shall agree upon with thy better-half
- Thou shall learn the EVE Bushido of the Parent Warrior
- EVEMon shall be installed on every PC I can come in contact with
- Thou shall know all the ins and outs of of the EVE Skill Planner
- ...
- ...
I didn't want to finish the list, not because I ran out of steam or ideas, but simply because I want you to add the last two! Come on!
28 comments:
Thou shalt use contraceptives if thou doesn't wish to live by these commandments.
Thou shalt buy an iPhone so you can refer to Capsuleer when thou needest.
Thou shalt be prepared to answer really inane questions about what you are doing, over and over again. "Yes, those are Spaceships." "Yes, they are in space." "Yes Daddy wants to kill that one." "No, not really kill him."
Remind of the book I keep threatening to write for my friends: "A Non-Parent's Guide to Parenting." Since I know how much better to raise his kids than he does. LOL
9. Thou shalt teach your offspring in the ways of EVE, so that when they grow up they will not fear the Pew Pew
10. Remember the Family time and keep it Holy
Thou shalt treat the Alliance Tournament as a major sporting event.
Thou shall LOG immediately to the call of spider! or bug so as to vanquish it with extreme prejudice!
If losing a ship to wife aggo, thou shalt keep thy fool mouth shut about it.
Thou shall not smack talk over vent if kids are in house, they hear such even when 5 rooms away and fast asleep.
Thou shalt fit a cloak on thy vessel so thou shalt be properly prepared in the Land of Null Sec. If Thou do not do this thy pod will be plagued with the wrath of 'bottle time!', 'Daddy I cut my knee!!!' and spillages of a Great Host of sticky drinks.
Thou hath been warned.
C.
If you teach the kiddies the ways of smack talk they can handle all your vent convos for you.
Thou shalt always rate Wife aggro above Sleeper aggro!
Thou shalt accept that EVE has no pause button, but that autpilot is an acceptable substitute.
Nap time = game time....mostly
Baby monitor shall be set to higher volume than vent.
Mod to above comment - wife aggro trumps all other aggro.
Thou shalt lift weights so that thee can be capable of balancing a Child of Mythical Size on thine shoulders and head whilst pew-pewing.
The beginning is a very delicate time, one which will not be repeated.
Learn the Holy Way of Passive Income and keep it, erm... holy.
Haha, love the post. My suggestions:
Thou shalt appease thy wife in compensation for a late night fleet op.
Thou shalt not judge thy fleet member who currently cannot speak over vent due to company/death stares from the wife.
Thou shalt not raise children for the sake of having mission running slaves.
1. A computer in the kitchen is a GOOD idea.
2. 27 jumps is plenty of time to prepare pb&j sandwiches for "Mom, I'm hungry!" later in the day.
Thou shalt NOT give your teenaged son access to your account so he can 'try it out'. His is the path of the trial and ever shall be.
10. Thou shalt train your offspring to love and serve in New Eden.
I'm not a parent (yet) and I already find it hard to balance real life with blogging. I just don't have enough time to game and blog and do everything else!
I'm secretly hoping that I win the lottery before I have kids and thus can have more free time :P
Thou shalt fit a cloak so that, at a moments notice, one can prepare cups o' tea n' toast n' rubbeth feets to compensate for expected absences from spouse and offspring.
Trust me, this works a treat. Though it's at odds to my EvE persona.
"Coming dearest..."
*cloak active*
Thou shalt bring thine wife into the flock of Pew Pew and raise thine chidren to fear mining lazers.
Thou cannot run from wife agro. Embrace thine fate and logofski.
Cheers
EVE SOB
p.s. My 6yo is a future pirate. He is disgusted in me flying around highsec not shooting people. Demanding that I set my drones onto any hauler we see.
Kids are bloody awesome!
Cheers
EVE SOB
Wow! We've got some great comments and commandments in there! So funny to read! Thanks guys!
Oh and @EVE SOB - You should send your 6yr old fly under Spectre's wing for a few missions! :p
LOL @CK!We have enough challenges with this child with out such corruption ;)
Thou shalt not hate thyn husband for leaving thou to join an alliance and thereafter making iskies gallore in belts and complexes in 0.0 whilst thou is living in the isk sink that is faction war... -.-
Thou shalt give thy husband kudos, in that whilst he is a poor man as you know him, he is a tycoon in New Eden.
Good one Lee! Hey look, I'm a Tycoon! :p
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